Both: Split decision. Howard doesn’t like it, while Lawrence thinks it’s pretty good (but not great). Both agree it’s markedly inferior to The Lord of the Rings: The Movie Trilogy (henceforth known as LOTR:TMT).
Howard Waldrop: They’ve been trying to make The Hobbit as a movie since the ‘60s (at one time to star the Beatles, with Ringo as Sam Gamgee). I’m sorry that didn’t happen—it would
Both: We really wanted to like this film, but the screenwriters made every character except the protagonist an idiot.
Lawrence Person: This is a prequel to Alien. It starts off in prehistory, depicting a very human-looking alien watching a saucer leave, then swallowing some icky living black goo, then dissolving into the rushing waters, where it’s replaced with animations of mutating DNA strands, presumably seeding Earth with
Both: Our only disagreement is just how much we love this film: Howard thinks The Avengers is the best Marvel superhero film ever made, while Lawrence thinks it’s the best live-action superhero film ever made. (The Incredibles is still the reigning champion as best superhero film period.)
Howard Waldrop: When I saw Thor, I thought, “The Marvel franchise is in trouble, they think they can roll
Both: Split decision: Howard, after some reflection, just doesn’t like it. Lawrence thinks it’s a good action/adventure film, but not a great one. Howard Waldrop: John Carter is Edgar Rice Burroughs for people who’ve seen Avatar and Lawrence of Arabia.
Lawrence Person: It strikes me as a good-faith effort to capture the feel of A Princess of Mars, updated just enough to make it (almost)
Both: Finally, to make up for the Skylines and Thors, Locus sent us to a great movie.
Lawrence Person: While reviewing The Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus, I jokingly suggested in passing that Terry Gilliam should make a serious crime drama and Martin Scorsese should make a Gilliamesque fantasy. Little did I suspect Scorsese would actually take me up on the offer…
Howard Waldrop: Hugo is
Both: This is a film that isn’t any better than it has to be. You have first-rate acting and solid direction in service of a third-rate script written by no less than six people, one of whose job was evidently to excise every last bit of surprise or cleverness from the dialogue.
HW: When I first heard this was coming, I thought of Spurs Jackson and His Space
Howard Waldrop: Thor is a big noisy mess.
Marvel’s luck with 3rd banana heroes and its hopes for The Avengers next year (all the 3rd banana heroes at once) comes to a screeching halt.
Lawrence Person: It would be tempting to do a one word review of “Eh.” Sadly, the word rate for that would not nearly come close to reimbursing Howard and me for our inflated 3D
Both: We had one hope going into Battle: Los Angeles: That it would be better than Skyline. Thankfully, it met this very, very low criteria for success. Beyond that, the question of whether you’ll it like boils down to this: How much originality do you require in your science fiction films? If the answer is “none,” you might well enjoy it, because Battle: Los Angeles doesn’t have
A wrap-up, then, of the movies I’ve seen, or had to see, in not my favorite decade so far, in not my favorite century.
While we were off seeing stuff, I hope better movies were playing elsewhere. I hope you saw them; we didn’t.
How Lawrence and I work: early each year we look at the IMDb (and other sources) and try to sign up for stuff that should be
Both: Wouldn’t it be swell if there was a first-rate alien invasion movie in theaters for you to watch?
Fortunately, there is. It’s called Monsters. You should go see it if it’s playing at a theater near you.
Unfortunately, we’re here to talk about Skyline, which isn’t. We have a slightly split opinion. Howard only thinks it sucks a little. Lawrence thinks it sucks a whole lot
Both: At last, Locus has sent us to see a swell movie. Advanced word was that this was this year’s District 9. But Monsters kicks District 9‘s ass. The setup is just as intriguing, the characters are a lot more interesting, and the script is easily ten times smarter.
Lawrence Person: Monsters is an extended exercise in low-key realism that works astonishingly well. This is probably
Howard Waldrop: Well, it could have been a lot worse.
Lawrence Person: Have you ever worked in an office building late at night? And you’re there late enough that your stomach starts rumbling, but you don’t have time to go out for dinner, so you go down to the vending area and there, between the Coke and candy machines, is the “food” vending machine, with canned soup, cheese
Both: Howard thought this was better than the original Iron Man, while Lawrence merely thought it as good. Either way, if you liked the first one, you’ll like this one.
Lawrence Person: The good thing about Iron Man 2 is that it isn’t any dumber than the original, which was, let’s face it, pretty dumb if you stopped to think about it. But if you’re watching a
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